speed, more speed, walking across, lots of nothing, magners

This'll be brief.  Took the overnight bus from San Ignacio northwards.  Got off in that nothing town I mentioned earlier and Alby (rightfully so) suggested we get back on the bus and keep going to Ensenada.  Ensenada's a cruise ship border town so it's filled with cheap prescription drugs, dirty bars and creepy dudes.  Well when in Rome right.  So we checked in to an hourly motel and hopped on the party train.  Long story short, after an amount of certain stuff that would make Robert Downey Jr. spin, too many beers, a good amount of nudity and going to bed at 5am we woke up not with a hangover, but with an empty, hollow, omg what happened feeling.  I did manage to meet a really cool chick tho...that wasn't a hooker!

Anyway, a few days of recovery and we crossed the border by foot in Tijuana then trained it back to LA.  Kicked it in LA for a couple weeks doing frankly nothing.  Did have a memorable afternoon with Herm though.  And you know, being on the road and seeing stuff and what not as I've been doing, I've come to realize that it's these kinds of little things that you really end up remembering.  People talk about these transcendental, life-altering experiences traveling, but I would tell them to piss off and that life is really made up of events like this - We got stoned (surprise).  Made some lunch together, hung out, then walked down the cliffs on low tide and spent a couple hours hiking around and exploring the tide pools.  Blunted it (surprise).  Then we went into this cave that I had always seen but never been in.  The opening is about the size of a man on his stomach but once you crawl through it opens up to maybe 30ft x 30ft.  Really awesome afternoon with my lil bro.  And something that keeps you grounded in what the human experience is really about.

Hopped up to SF for 5 days, saw Bert and the gang which twas awesome, ate at HOPR (omg so good) and then flew over to HK.  So here I am.  Half drunk on Magner's in SoHo HK being British in Asia and staying with Nathan.  Talk soon once I'm back in Vietnam.

winds and whales, federalis, shark bait, rainin whales, hitching with scallops

Flew into La Paz down on the tip of the Baja Peninsula and rented a car to drive out to La Ventana since Alby wanted to learn to kite surf.  What a hell hole.  I mean it's beautiful and the drive through the desert mountains is Y Tu Mama Tambien esque but it's just packed with retired Canadian and American baby boomers living in trailers and baking in the sun.  You know, the types of old chicks that look like old leather saddles.

Anyway, long story short - we bailed on La Ventana (and kite surfing) and drove back to La Paz.  Booked into a hostel and headed straight for one of my principal draws to Baja - fish tacos.  Ran into a lil taco stand on the street and oh yeah it was business time.  Fried to perfection with a toppings bars of all types of salsas, peppers, onion dishes, etc.  Money.

Woke early to swim with whale sharks.  Titties in yo face good.  Swam along a 20-something foot whale shark within inches.  Then took the afternoon to have a joy ride into the desert.  As we were leaving the city, I passed a cop who promptly began following me (all rental cars have license plates and special markings).  So after verifying that we were indeed white, they pulled me over.  F me.  Federalis.  They have quite the bad rep and I wanted nothing to do with them.

"You know why I pulled you over?"

"Nope, why?"

"Speeding mano."

"Oh really?  Well honestly I was just following everyone else and honestly other cars were passing me. So if you were really going after speeders why didn't you pull them over?"

"Yeah, well I can't stop everyone."

So on it went, and he eventually told me that he'd be writing me a ticket for a whopping 1,800 pesos (like $150) and that he'd have to retain my license until I went into the office and paid for it.

"Fine, I'll pay it senor.  But tomorrow, I got things to do right now."

So then he agreed to go call in to his supervisor to see what to "do about the sitch".  Then the "good cop" came over and told me that you know, if I could pay right now I'd get a discount.  So how much would I be willing to pay to make everything disappear right now?

Ah, right the mordida.  Was waiting for that.

"Well, officer, I'd really like to pay $0."  So then I went into this lengthy story about how we're not the typical gringos here to party (kinda true) and that we've been in Guatemala working on a food security project (true) and honestly I spend all my money on that and feeding children (eh maybe 30% true).  And we came to Mexico to evaluate new project places, you know, to help kids feed themselves (100% lie).

"So, you see, sir, I really have no money to give you much less pay a ticket."  His face dropped.  "Ok, yeah, you can go."

So day 2 in La Paz, went to Espiritu Santo Island.  On the way out we cruised through a pod of about 100 dolphins and then trekked out to a sea lion nursery.  Wetsuits and masks on and in we went.  We started in say 50 ft. of water but as we neared the shore we hit a school of a million or so sardines.  Birds, predatory fish and sea lions sliced their way through the school gorging themselves.  Soon the sea lions started playing with us, swimming up to our faces, nibbling our flippers etc.  Thuper duper cool.

Made it back into town and really for no reason we just got black out drunk.  Maybe cuz it was Carnaval or cuz we had just sorted out our next few days.   Anyway we got wasted, I finished the night eating another of the best carne asada burritos of my life (we ate them every night) and woke up at 6am with bloodshot eyes.

Ran to the bus station and hopped on an 11 hour bus ride to San Ignacio.  Without much of a plan and a ton of hunger, we arrived around 6pm.  We were headed to San Ignacio Laguna to watch the Gray Whales (childhood dream of mine).  Unfortunately it's about 1.5 hours out of town and there's 2 ways to get there - take a shuttle for anywhere from $40-$80 a person or hitchhike.  Luckily a fisherman from this town of ~100 had just dropped someone off at the bus so we hitched a ride with him through the desert to the lagoon.

Made it to camp around 730pm.  The camp was located in the middle of the desert on the water with no lights, no noise, nothing.  Perf.  Ate until we almost puked, setup our tent purchased from Wal-Mart the day before and popped a valium.  Awoke to a killer desert sunrise and whales playing in the water in front of the tent.

You know how Arnold once said that pumping iron is like having an orgasm so that when he lifts it's like a constant orgasm?  Yeah, the whale watching wasn't like that for me.  But en serio, it was surreal. We were surrounded by dozens of Gray Whales, jumping, fluking, mother and calf, etc.  Even got to see two whales having sex.  Anyway, it was just really sweet being within feet of these beasts.

So finished with two tours and we wanted to head north instead of spend the night on the beach.  As essentially no one lives there they said we should wait til morning when a car would be going into town.  Nah, we'll walk the 50 miles and hope to hitch a ride.  We had 1.5L of water, 12 pretzels and 2 ciggies.  So we'd live at least.

About 2 miles into the walk we got a ride with a toothless old dude bringing potable water to his "community" (there were 3 houses).  That took us a good 5-10 miles but then back to the road.  We had resigned ourselves to walking all night to catch the 5am bus north.  Just as the sun was setting, we turned around to snap some pics when a car came up over the hill.  Was a scallop diver going back into town and he was more than happy to take us.  So into the bed of his pickup we went, sandwiched between a couple hundred lbs. of scallops as we shot through the desert just as the stars came out.

Got dropped off, gave him a bottle of whiskey para decir gracias, and ate some din.  Walked over to the bus station, missed the 830 bus and so here we are sitting on a dark stretch of Highway 1 waiting for our 11pm bus to some town I've only heard of this morning.

the many faces of chingar, crushing midgets, vomiting in mcdonalds, bbqs, no mas porfa, back seat hj's, baja

Man, been a long week.  Or 5 days or whatever.  Honestly I've lost myself in Mexico.  I've gone beyond merely forgetting what day it is but now don't even know what month it is.  Don't worry padres, i'm all good though.

So we flew into Mexico City, threw our stuff down in the hostel and started chugging the homemade mezcal that i bought from a guy on the beach in mazunte that was carrying around gas cans of the stuff.  I mean it seemed like the thing to do here eh.  Anyway, after half the bottle and a handful of beers we were bien chingados and went to lucha libre (mexican wrestling).  I really can't explain the spectacle.  It takes a dump on WWE's chest.  They throw midgets at each other for crying out loud.  And of course the barrage of insults makes it even better - chinga tu madre!, vete a la mierda!, no vales ni verga!

Woke up feeling god awful.  Like just horrible.  Alby's old mate from high school, a former exchange student, lives in Cuernevaca, about an hour outside of the city.  So he picked us up around 9am and after a quick Mickey D's bfast I felt whole again.  We planned on doing a bit of hiking and seeing some ruins but we started drinking in the car to get rid of the hangover and once we saw a pulque stand those plans evaporated.  Pulque's made from a plant similar to agave (for tequila)...they extract the "honey water" from the plant and let it ferment for about a day before mixing it with fruits and serving it.  Good side - tastes great and isn´t too strong.  Bad side - it keeps fermenting in your stomach so you just start farting for the next 12 hours.

Went to Israel's parents house and stayed on the sauce.  Honestly, it was really the experience I came to Mexico for.  To spend a day with Israel and his extended family, drinking, learning mexican slang, discussing local politics and life with narcos was simply surreal.  They made a huge feast for us and then we switched to tequila before ending the night in a drunken stupor.

Took the bus back to mexico city the next day, watched the super bowl, blehhhh and passed out.  Spent the next day wandering around mexico city (which btw is a supremely awesome city with unreal architecture) and had some much needed pho for dinner before heading to bed early.

I'm gonna talk more about this later but I have to say that mexico has such an undeserved reputation, which honestly is a big reason why i wanted to come here.  Ya knah, when people speak of mexico it's either about the wasted gringos in cancun where everyone speaks english or the narcos and how dangerous the entire country is.  Don't get me wrong, it can be dangerous, just like any place (you really dont think nyc is incredibly dangerous) but our experiences thus far have been to the contrary.  We've met some of the most awesome people, seen beautiful landscapes and had some of the best food possible.  Not to mention the abundance of hotties here.  And it's awesome too.  They eat tacos and meat, drink beer etc but have bodies of angels.  Take note americanas - you don't need to stick to the vodka soda and iceberg lettuce diet cuz guess what it ain't working anyway.  come to mexico and see how real women live.

Anyway, we bussed it to Guadalajara, watched anotheeeeer lucha libre (albys an addict) and woke up with a  splitting hangover just in time for the tequila tour this morning.  Went to the town of Tequila (where almost all the world's tequila comes from) and was aptly drunk by noon.  Fell in love with the tour guide, who btw had the most bellisimaaaa smile i've ever seen and then we took care of a drunken 50 year old chilean woman.  God what an embarrassment.  On the bus ride back she, um, got a bit physical with alby, told the bus that i turn her on and started crying on the phone to her daughter (who wasnt actually on the phone).  A veces chingas el tequila, a veces el tequila te chinga i guess.

So here we are.  I'm on the otherside of drunk by now, a bit hungover, and we're headed to a chinese buffet before hitting the hay.  Leaving at 6am manana for La Paz, the tip of Baja.  Whale sharks, diving, fishing, gray whales and their calves...man i am beyonnnnd excited.  i'm actually foamin at the mouth i'm so excited.  ciao.

tequila the right way, tortas, oaxacan meat market, perdido en escondido, matisland

The shuttle got us into San Cristobal de las Casas around 5pmish and we sussed out a hotel before heading out for food and drink.  Had a great torta cubana and then went out for just.one.drink as typical with Alby and I.  Since we were the only people at the bar (twas like a Tuesday night) we sat at the bar and chatted up the bartender for the night.  He's a "tequilero" as they say, aka a tequila lover, so he taught us all about different tequilas and mezcals.  Even showed us how they drink theirs, with a sip and then a sip of water or sangrita, which is kinda like a tomatoey/woerstchire/barbecuey marinade.  As the only customers, we ended up trying quit a few tequilas and got home a bit sloppy.  

San Cristobal is like a fancy Antigua pero without the gross amounts of white tourists...yes, it's touristy, but mostly from south america or europe.  So we took a night bus the following day to Oaxaca.  Sleeping pills gave us a bit of rest but sleeping on a moving bus/plane/watev is never very comfortable.  Got into Oaxaca in the morning and started putzing around town.  Honestly our experience revolved around the food and food markets there.  Had mole obvi, chilaquiles, etc.  Then we found a hallway off the main food market that was just meat.  All meat.  And grills.  Meat and grills.   Nough said.  

After a couple days gorging in Oaxaca we took a bus to Puerto Escondido.  Really nice beaches with great surf but too touristy for my liking.  Passed a couple days eating and lounging around the beaches before we hopped on a bus down to Mazunte.  Isolated, really tranquil spot.  Alby and I are sharing a crackden shack overlooking the ocean.  Lots of naughty time seafood for cheap.  Though in my opinion there's way too many hippies here.  Like naked yoga, family with two dads and a mom, more necklaces than all of the Claire's in the world, etc.  Going on a snorkeling/fishing trip tomorrow so hopefully that's fun.  Hopefully we have time to visit some of the other beaches as well.  

Then flying to Mexico City to meet up with Coreen and watch some lucha libre.  hasta prontito cabrones.  

aussie rules, demo gardens, cuando te vayas, mexico

Bout to leave Guatemala for Mexico manaña.  First lesson learned in Guatemala is don't make bets with Aussies.  They don't play games.  Looks like I'm the hook for now but asi es i guess.  Really haven't been doing anything to exciting hurr in Xela.  Mainly been running around tying up loose ends I left from last time and building a small demo aquaponic garden for Juan Pablo to take to presentations and such.  We actually built a really sweet setup, using a media-based grow bed, bell siphon and supplemental airlift pump.  Gah, my parents would be so proud of the engineer I've sorta but not really become.  

Finally ate ceviche from the back of a truck which was a pretty tasty midday treat.  Leavin la chinita will be tough but who knows where we might meet up next.  One things for sure tho - def need to come back to latin america an improve my spanish.  Alright that's it for now.  On to San Cristobal tomorrow.  Vaya con dios, brah.

jungle trance, sleeping in the trees, 18 hours, practica de lengua, fishies

Man were we ready to bounce outta LA.  Flew from LA to Mexico City and killed the 5 hour layover by drinking all afternoon.  Probs not the best idea.  Landed in Costa Rica at midnight hungover and then jumped over to the 24 hr Denny's by the airport to wait til our 5am bus to the border.

Was comatose on the ride over to Los Chiles, ate some breaky then took a boat down the river to the Nicaraguan border.  From there, hopped on another boat down the Rio San Juan and stopped in a nothing town, Sabalo, then transferred for another boat to go deeper into the jungle.

Arrived at our destination, El Castillo, and booked a place to stay.  Really in the thick of the jungle and only accessible by the irregular boats that pass by, the town was just what we were looking for.  Set up a tour with a local guide but since he wanted to spend New Year's Eve with his fam, we kicked it for a couple days in the town of about 75 peeps.

Woke up to a cayman in the river outside our room, toured the city, etc., then hopped aboard the sauce train.  Spent the Eve drinking El Caballito, to which we gave the nickame of horse tranquilizer.  Hung out with our guide's family for a bit which was awesome then spent the rest of the night at a jungle trance running around the dance floor.

Woke up to pissing rain and a raging hangover the next day.  Hating life, Alby and I got in our canoe along with our fav Kiwi couple and the two guides.  We paddled down river and to quote Forrest Gump, it was raining so hard I didn't know if the rain was coming down or up.  We spent the next few days canoeing downriver, trekking through the jungle and fishing.  It was pretty much the perfect way for us to spend New Year's.  We had to catch what we ate, shared the river banks with crocs and slept in hammocks.  The first night was pretty tough actually.  Everything was simply soaked and I slept for just a few hours.  Restless all night, I knew it was about morning when the jungle started echoing with the calls of howler monkeys which pretty much sound like girls from Staten Island having an orgasm.

We slept on an island in the middle of the river the second night, and after splitting a sleeping pill, the two of us slept solidly for like 10 hours.

On the last day we had a midriver pickup where we paddled out to a passing boat and they brought us back up river to El Castillo.  Spent a few uneventful days heading up north through Granada and Leon and then bussed it back to Antigua.

From Antigua my feral friend went off to do Semuc Champey and Tikal and I spent a day in Guatemala City before coming back to Xela.  Got weird with some locals and checked out a really sweet permaculture project that takes kids off the streets.  Glad to be back, checked the garden, the fish are still alive and the garden's almost completely cycled so woohoo.

Twas actually reallllly nice being back by myself cuz it gave me the chance to start hanging out with my Guatemalan friends.  Started seeing one of my friends so that's been nice.  And they weren't kidding that dating improves your Spanish exponentially.

Chilling here for another 10 days or so then time to head north through Mexico.  hasta pronto.

glitter and glam, melting santas, back in asia, peacocking, return to the road

Jiminy, so it's been a bit over a month since our last chat.  I spose I've been up to a lot but also not much at all.  Came home right in time for Thanksgiving, weighed in at my pre-Guate weight (woohoo 3rd world diet!) and hung out with the family.  Read books, caught up on project work, watched sunsets, drove around with the windows down and the heat on.  The usual for PV one might say.  Honestly those couple weeks were pretty much a giant haze.  I mean.  Blur.  Giant blur.

Booked it back to SF for a couple weeks.  Man o man how I miss it up there.  Saw Bert, who's becoming more ROC everyday and other bros and broettes around town.  My feral friend Alby that I met in Vietnam came into town ahead of our trip down south so I had a buddy to putz around SF with.  Michelle (RBF not ex-gf) and I hosted our second annual date night and needless to say things got thuper weird.  Can't wait for next year!!!  Berlin edition!?!  Spent a couple days in the East Bay which included a site visit to our pilot in East Oakland.  Pretty sweet.  Also checked out the site where we'll be putting our community program "Guns to Gardens".  Stay tuned for that one.

We kicked it at Bam Bam's place in North Beach for a few days which was soooo money.  Sure NB is a bit douchey for my long-term tastes but its next door neighbor is Chinatown.  So we had some variation of Asian food at least twice a day.  Ya knah, trying to get my fix before heading south again.  Side note, he has f'ing heat lamps on his patio!!  Perfect for the meteor shower broheim.

Woke up hungover for Santacon, walked to Chinatown for some pho and then to our friend Jennica's to pregrame.  Threw some drinks back and then we dahnced around Polk as merry fat men for a bit.  Headed to Michelle's going away after that to keep da party moving and then hopped aboard the Bootie train surprise surprise.  I do have to say tho that my new sleeveless cookie monster sweatshirt was like a siren song on the dance floor.  I used it to meet this one chick by sneaking up behind her in line for the bano and whispering "do you want my cookies child?"

No I'm jk.  That would be really weird.  Like weird in a bad way, not a thuper cool way.  But I did meet an awesome  chick and spent the night tearing up the d flo with her.  In true mdm fashion, I took her to Mission Chinese the following week and then we ended at Dirty Thieves getting bizco over PBR whiskey specials.  You know, the further I creep out of this BPY cave the more I learn about what I'm looking for.  I feel like for the first time the proper head is doing not all, but at least most of the decision making.  So much so that I didn't even go for a dflo makeout that night.  She was really smart, mellow AND athletic.  Athletic body > skinny ano body in mi opinion.  Would be cool to get to kno her more but alas, this life of semi-solitude is what i've chosen to live for now.

Anyway, we came back to LA for Christmas and more of the same general LA'ing about life.  Made it out to Silver Lake anoche to meet up with Jane & Co. and see Ninaaaaaa.  Nice seeing my favorite wee adventurer lolz.  Silver Lake was actually pretty cool, but yeaaaah.  Reaaaaallllly hipster.  Finished the night at LA institution Tommy's and night capped in only the truest LA fashion.  Cruising through downtown on the 110 blazed and listening to 90s rap.

Sir Alby and I fly down to Costa Rica tomorrow morning and gonna spend the night there.  Then taking the 530am bus to Los Chiles, Costa Rica and a boat up the river to El Castillo, Nicaragua.  Wanna spend bout a week losing ourselves in the jungle before heading back up to Guate and then through Mexico to the good ole USA.   And then kicking it in SE Asia til the Mongol Rally.  Get some.