Just got back from Semuc Champey last night. Jiminy Xmas was it worth it. We took the 4am bus from Xela to Guatemala City and then hopped on a shuttle to Coban. As expected, they had oversold the shuttle so we were cramped in and sitting on the floor. The driver said we were going to meet up with another bus and we'd do a lil exchange to give my group more space since there was a couple sitting in front and we just needed two seats. Well when that time finally arrived I took care of translating for the Israeli couple and explained that the other bus was going to the same place, everything'd be cool, etc. Well when the Israeli douche saw that he'd have to give up shotgun, he whined (pretty usual for an Israeli) in his bastard spanish that he was too tall to fit in the other seats. Oh I'm sorry you kunt. I'm your same size and I've been sitting on the floor in between someone's legs for 3 hours. But yeah, you deserve your king-size space just like you have the right to push people off their land in the name of God and label them all as terrorists. Right. Anyway, after lunch, our Brit friend Claire channeled her inner Iron Lady and just took the front seat. The kunts bickered and whined but she remained obstinate. Ahh, how refreshing was that front seat jaja. We finally got to Lanquin around 5pm and then took another shuttle into the park, an hour further (only 10kms) on a dirt road through the jungle. Omg like soooooooo Heart of Darkness. The hostel I chose was perfect. The other options were in the barrio that is Lanquin and are just party places filled with wasted aussies and kiwis (sorry Alby, I just can't handle hoards of ya'll).
Anyway, it's nestled in the mountains along the river with essentially 0 infrastructure. There's only 4 hours of electricity a day and lemme tell you, blazing trees under the stars with only the sounds of water trickling by and night birds and insects humming their tunes is pretty prettttty pretttttty sweet.
Oh yeah and it's walking distance from the main attraction, Semuc Champey park. Semuc is a series of rivers above and under the ground with limestone caves and pools. Really really breathtaking - the pic says it all. After the pools and swimming through underwater mini-caves and such, we took a cave tour.
Good God. So no one really tells you what it is. They handed us a candle each and we started walking in. There's a river pouring out of the cave and as we started wading in, the river became deeper until we reached a point where we had to swim through near darkness, only following the candle flickers ahead of us. Because you can't see below you, I kicked a rock as I was treading water and took a chunk of flesh out. We scaled walls alongside roaring waterfalls and kept feeling our way to the end of the tunnel.
After a couple more swims and stumbles, we were reaching the end of the cave and uggh the exit, finally. Well there was a tunnel, about the circumference of a pretty fat dude, maybe Cee Lo Green or something. Anyway, I couldn't see the bottom but could hear water hitting down below. "Go for it" the guide told me. "Uh, yeah but where am I going?" I trembled back. Well, that convo got nowhere really fast so I just had to trust him and went for it. Surrender to the world, trust that you will prevail, and you shall conquer life I always say. It was a quick ride through the "tunnel" and then I hit the water. For a brief moment on the way back up I worried about I don't know, a potential lack of space or air at the surface, but it all worked out. Gah what an adventure.
Took the journey back yesterday and now back to same ole same ole.
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